I’ll be glad to see the day when the front page isn’t 70% step-fantasies.

Trick question. The answer is Captain Kathryn Janeway.

But why?

Disable safety protocols.

In response to nearly everything, “That was my high school nickname!”

Pizza dude’s got 30 seconds.

Aaaand now I’m sad.

Police

Because we really need yet another Superman movie…

Shoog Shoog in my ass.

I think we left What If long ago.

Freeballin’ FTW!

I DD’d for my girlfriend and her friend FOR THE GLORY OF THE EMPIRE!!!

Then we should string them up in a tree and beat them with sticks,

… To get the candy.

They taste like forgiveness

What am I supposed to… You sneaky bastard.

They stole my catchphrase!

Always has been.🔫

But how could yours be real when mine are the only real ones?

This. Time traveling is a purely selfish endeavour.

Go back and kill Hitler? Congratulations! Only you understand what changed. Doesn’t help the 7 billion people you left in your original timeline.