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Cake day: July 13th, 2023

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  • I tend toward giving disciplinary spankings in a rules based dynamic. And I will separate sensual impact play from spankings with floggings and light whipping in bondage so as to keep spankings or correction real and distinct. A sensual flogging will likely end in sex. But a disciplinary spanking will lead to corner time, to air out her spanked bottom for self reflection, then end with aftercare. Not sex.

    I no longer spank by hand because over the years of regular typing I’ve developed carpel tunnel syndrome. So if over the knee is agreed upon, I’ll use a small hand paddle I have. Otherwise, I prefer the cane. And the reason for that is that canes have a very wide latitude for intensity. Light flicks of the wrist can give a mild spanking, leading to a red bottom, but not harsh stripes or welts. And this goes up in gradations to vary harsh spankings with welts and stripes, though I always pain threshold test and am careful not to exceed my partner’s limits. If the cane is not acceptable, my next choice is the strap. I have two, one a traditional handmade two tailed tawse and the other a regular strap. But these have less intensity range on the light end. A strap will just flop around if you strike lightly, so it either hurts or it really hurts.

    Which implement and intensity levels are negotiated based on a rules and consequences agreement. But my bottom line (so to speak) is that consequences must be real. Even the proportionally lightest spanking for cause must at least be effective to likely deter repeating whatever problematic behavior led to correction in the near term.

    A partner who agrees to this is expected to participate in her correction. She will have ample opportunity to appeal or call a safeword, but once she agrees to a spanking she will engage in the process without avoidance. She will hold position and not block. Etc. And the spanking will not be sensual, though a warmup might be. Ultimately, a disciplinary spanking should hurt.

    I don’t spank my child, only adult women in a consensual dynamic.